A big, hot mess

My weekend SUCKED! I know most people only post about the good things that happen in their life, but not me, not today. I read several blogs and have many Facebook friends and I often find myself comparing my life to theirs. I usually end up feeling horrible about myself. How can they cook a wonderful meal, spend quality time with their children, finish their crafts, have a perfectly clean house and manicured yard, lose __ # of pounds and fit in a weekly date night with their husband??? My life is just not that perfect. I am a hot mess, have a HORRIBLE temper, get stressed easily, take things out on the people closest to me and retreat when I feel like I can't take it any more. I won't go into details, but just know that I may be in need of some prayers. Prayers for patience, tolerance, energy, and for my family and friends to be able to love me at my worst. We start work again tomorrow and I will be honest in taying that I haven't even thought about school, yet. So, yeah, I feel like a complete and total loser right now. I know things will get better. They always do. It's just hard to see how things will work out for good when you are in the middle of the mess.

As for Drew, he is doing better and is able to do most things that don't involve raising his hand above his head, lifting or pushing and pulling. He still can't drive, but hopefully that will change in a few more weeks. Then he will start physical therapy. That will just add one more thing to our wonderful schedule. (Sarcasm is a wonderful thing.)

Oh, and just because I know some people expect it: only 287 more days until Summer 2013!

Update...

We've had a few uneventful days and that's just the way I like it! Drew is feeling better and is able to do much of his self care. I still have to help with showers and baths and shaving. He can do just about everything else. Of course, he can't cook, clean, do dishes, do laundry, vacuum, etc., but that's why we have kids! Seriously, the kids have been great and are helping out willingly around the house. I know that could change quickly, but I'll count my blessings while I can! We go back to work on Monday, so things may be a little hairy for a while until we get a schedule and routine that works for us. It's all a learning process.

I registered Addie for school today. I can't believe it's time for her to be in school, but she's ready. I can't wait to see how much she learns this year!

There's not a lot to report today. We are still waiting to hear from the doctor about scheduling Drew's EMG. His leg still bothers him all day and is worse at night. We need to find out what is going on with that. His shoulder pain is getting better. He has at least 4 and 1/2 more weeks before he can drive. He will also start physical therapy then. We are hopeful that he will regain full strength and range of motion in his right shoulder. I am still thankful each day that the accident wasn't worse.

We have 6 more days of summer and we are going to try to enjoy them to the fullest!

Friday

Drew had a pretty good day today. He is starting to move around more and his shoulder isn't as sore as it was. I am thankful. I took the kids bowling today then we went by Ms. Linda's for a while so they could play. I say a while, but I ended up staying for three hours! I love talking with her and I could have stayed much longer. I hope I didn't wear her out!

I made BLTs for dinner tonight and they were good! I had a loaf of tomato basil bread from Panera and some Wright's bacon. Wright's is the only way to go. I was a short order cook tonight and everyone got to choose what they wanted on their sandwich. I had pepper jack cheese, bacon (of course!), mayo, tomato and arugula. I ate every last crumb! The kids ate all of theirs, too.

Tomorrow I am planning on going to the gym for kickboxing and body pump.  Then I am going to have a little selfish time at the pool by myself listening to my audiobook. Drew wants me to do this, so who am I to argue?!? Some of his friends are coming over to visit with him, so I need to get out of the way. The kids may end up at the pool with me, but I will still be relaxing. I need a little relaxation after the last two weeks! I don't think I will even feel guilty this time!

We have ONE more week of summer break. I don't know how things are going to work out once school starts, but I know we will manage. We have had AMAZING support from family and friends so far and I KNOW I have people I can call on if I (we) get into a bind. I know we are allowed to experience hardships for different reasons. I just hope and pray God will be glorified through all of this and we will grow in our faith as we travel this journey. Thanks for checking in!

Thursday

Today was a fairly normal summer day for us. I woke up early this morning and couldn't go back to sleep so I went to the gym for an hour. When I got home I took a shower and ate breakfast with Addison. All the boys in the house were still sleeping so we had some quality girl time. She talked my ear off and I loved every minute of it! When she gets started she doesn't stop! Addie and I went to Academy to exchange some shorts I had bought the day before, went to the pediatricians office to pick up a copy so her shot records so I can register her for kindergarten next week then we went to Kroger to get some groceries. When we got home Drew had the boys vacuuming and doing laundry. He was using them as his hands. They were pretty good sports about it, too, so I am thankful for that. After all that was done I took 2 benedryls. I was stung by a bee a couple of days ago and the sting site was pretty angry! Oh, my, goodness I got so sleepy! I ended up taking a THREE hour nap this afternoon. Seriously, three hours and I could have slept longer but I had to take Addie to soccer practice. While we were at practice one of our friends dropped off some BBQ for dinner. It was so yummy and we are thankful for people who care about us. This has been such a blessing through all of this. After dinner Drew and I watched the season finale of Dallas. I am thankful for an uneventful day. Tomorrow I plan on taking the kids out for a little while to do something fun.

Drew's shoulder seems to be healing well and the pain has subsided a lot. He still cant use that arm so I am still taking care of most of his personal needs, but he can use his hand a little bit. His main complaint right now is his left leg. That is the side the truck struck. He has been experiencing numbness, a buzzing feeling and shooting pains in that leg. He is going to have an EMG done sometime in the near future to see if there is some nerve damage. Hopefully it is nothing that can't be reversed or fixed. His leg really gives him trouble at night and last night he said he was almost in tears. Drew does not cry~ever, so I know it really hurts. If you feel led would you pray for comfort for him and for the doctors to be able to find the cause of his pain? Thank you so much for checking in with us and for lifting us up in prayer.

Not Fun Times

Drew has had a rough couple of days. I thought it would be a good idea to get out of the house a little yesterday. We went to lunch (Addie tagged along) and ventured out to Walmart. I know, I know, even when ou are fully healthy Walmart is a beating! I needed some things and we needed some groceries, so I was trying to get it all in one place. Drew can't really eat very well because of his left hand not working properly and he really wasn't very hungry, but he was a good sport and went along. At the store I could tell he was losing energy quickly. When it was time to check out I thought he was going to have to go sit down. It just really wiped him out. Less than two weeks ago he was jogging three miles a few times a week and now he can't walk around Walmart for 45 minutes without getting exhausted. It's really sad. He hasn't been sleeping very well at night, either. He falls asleep for 30 minutes or so and wakes up because he is uncomfortable. His left thigh is really starting to bother him. It feels numb when he touches it, but it has a burning sensation on the inside. That's the side the truck hit, so I'm sure there is some nerve damage. His left knee is still swollen and sore, too. Today he is running a low grade temperature. We go back to the doctor tomorrow afternoon for his post-op appointment. This whole ordeal is really wearing him down emotionally and physically. He is starting to wonder how he will be able to work in a couple of weeks. If you feel lead, please pray for him and all that is going on right now. This is hard on him, me, the kids and our family as a whole. My friends have tried to lessen the burden by sending food and gift cards to restaurants. Drew's family has taken the kids several times, too. That has helped SO MUCH! I am so appreciative of the help we have been given and feel blessed to have giving people in our lives. Now if we could just get Drew to heal really fast we would be in business!

Saturday

I keep having to remind myself what day it is. Time is strange right now. I almost feel like I did right after I had my babies. Time is passing, but time doesn't matter. When you are getting up several times during the night and sleeping during the day, time takes on a different look.

Drew slept in the recliner last night. I use the term sleep loosely. He didn't get restful sleep, but dozed off here and there. Jackson was so sweet and slept on the couch so he could help his daddy if he needed it. I got up a couple of times to check on him and to change the ice in his ice machine. He can't unhook himself from the ice machine with his left hand so he is stuck in the chair until someone unhooks him.

I took Drew's advice this morning to take some time to take care of myself. I went to the gym for Turbo Kick and a Body Pump class. It was good to take my mind off of things for a couple of hours. When I got home I gave Drew a makeshift sponge bath. He can't get his upper body wet, so we've had to come up with a solution. He stands in the tub and I wash him from the waist down. He can't do it with his left hand and arm the way it is. Believe me, there are a lot of jokes and laughs going on during this process. Sometimes you just have to make the most of the situation. He is in pain, but I can still make him laugh!

After he got cleaned up I decided to tackle the yard. The weed eater is going to be the death of me. Also, there must be some art to blowing the cut grass in the street with the blower. I think more gets stuck on my sweaty body than gets in the street. I'll figure it out, eventually. I did decide, though, while I was mowing that the grass can be cut every two weeks instead of every week. I won't win any awards, but I won't get a citation from the city. Every two weeks will have to suffice.

Drew's brother, David, came by to pick up the kids and take them to his house for a little while.  Then they are spending the night with Gram and going to church with her in the morning. They have been so nice (along with Matthew and Carrie and our friends Toni and Kirk) to take the kids for a while so Drew can rest. I don't know if we can ever repay them for their kindness. So, Drew and I are just hanging out together trying to rest and catch up on some Olympics action. We are watching yesterday's events now and should make it to today's soon. Hopefully, Drew can get some restful sleep tonight and have a little less pain tomorrow.

Food Glorious Food and an update on Drew

We have been so blessed by people offering to bring food to our house. It seems like such a small thing to the giver, but to the receiver it is huge. I have not had to think about what to fix for dinner and that has been wonderful! For lunch we make sandwiches or eat leftovers, so it's the gift that keeps on giving! If you have brought us food or are on the schedule to bring us food, THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! We have been blessed!

Now for an update on Drew:

Before his surgery he was injected with a nerve block. It made his shoulder, arm and hand completely numb. It did, however, start to wear off in the middle of the night. It was only suppose to last 18-24 hours so we were expecting that.  His pain today was an 8-9 on the pain scale even with Vicodin. He was pretty miserable, but that is to be expected. He didn't sleep well last night, so that just added to the misery. I have kept him on the ice machine since we got home yesterday, so hopefully that is keeping the swelling down. He was ordered to stay on it for 72 hours so we will do that. He tried to get up every once in a while to walk around the house so he wouldn't be sitting all day. Now that his right hand isn't numb he can feed himself as long as I cut everything up for him. He has to rest his arm on the table and just move his hand at the wrist. Then he pokes his food with the fork and turns his hand toward his mouth. It's not very mannerly but it gets the job done! I'm sure tomorrow will look very much like today. At least we have good tv to watch~ Olympics! Hopefully each day will get a little better. I have been staying busy cleaning, doing laundry and attending to his needs. To quote a line in Bugs' Life, "It's our lot in life. It's not a lot, but it's our life."

Surgery Day

Drew just went back and I am sitting in the waiting room. Apparently when people wait they eat. I am sitting here listening to wrappers crinkling and mouths crunching. Maybe only "quiet" foods should be allowed in waiting rooms! Also a teenage boy is listening to music on his phone while watching a movie on his laptop while NOT wearing headphones! Really?!? The Olympics are playing on tv, but I can't hear the announcers from all the crinkling, crunching, music and bombs blowing up on the laptop! People aren't quiet in their conversations, either. I was hoping for a quiet, relaxed time waiting for Drew and praying for a successful surgery. I am going to try to overlook the craziness in here and focus on the fact that Drew will be finished soon and we can go home! I will update more later. I can't even think right now!

UPDATE:

We are home! Drew slept for a little while and has just eaten some lunch. He couldn't feed himself so Addie did it for him! She was very attentive. This may be her new job! He can't grip a fork very well with his left hand and he can't turn his hand at the wrist to get the fork to his mouth. It's pretty sad when my big, strong husband can't feed himself. Addie will be a great helper, though!

The boys have gone home with Cheryl and will spend the night with Kelly and her boys.  Addie has soccer practice and will spend the night with a friend afterward. I am SO THANKFUL for family and friends who have stepped in and offered to help. I couldn't do it without them. Drew won't be able to drive for at least six weeks, so I am going to have to get over my insecurity about asking for help. This is going to be a good growth period for me. We will just be hanging out at home tonight watching the Olympics. Drew is hooked  up to an ice machine, so he is stuck in the house. Not that he would want to go anywhere anyway! He is suppose to keep that on for three days. He may get cabin fever before its all said and done!

We are just going to play it by ear eah day and take it as easy as possible. We have a couple of weeks before we have to go back to work, so this will be some good recovery time. I will update more later. Thanks for checking in with us!